Sometimes

Sometimes, what you want to do is exactly what you need.
Sometimes, you don't have a reason for the question put up to you. You just don't. I have no idea why.
Sometimes, it's good to just pour it all out in words to someone who you know wouldn't remember it the next day. Even if it is something you generally don't do.
Sometimes, it's good to cry. When you have the tiniest thing becoming the biggest thing in your head and it makes you wanna take it out through tears, then trying to get all the bad times together in one corner of the head and all the times that could possibly get the tears to come out is what one could do. If that's what's gonna make the heaviness of it all go away. Or if not completely, then atleast the bigger part of it.
Sometimes, you want to listen to music at a volume so loud that you wouldn't mind screaming through it.
And sometimes, the lyrics are all that matter.

Crankiness. Irritation. For no reason at all. No reason.

The feeling of not being able to take anything at all any longer. Any human being around you.

Space and time is what one needs? Is that the answer?

The soothing tune of a song or the soothing words coming out of a person's mouth, irrespective of this person being an important person in your life or not, is what makes it all go away, but all very slowly.
Sometimes, not knowing is what comforts you more. And also, that's what's better.
Sometimes, I wonder what I'd do if the concept of music didn't exist.
Sometimes, you don't know how to go about it all. Go about answering questions to which you don't have the answers yourself, and you probably never will, but you still expect people to understand because people are what matter.
Sometimes, chocolate does it all and sometimes everything you try doesn't make much difference.

Life is a ride maybe. At the end of it, what matters to you now is probably gonna be something that wouldn't make a difference even remotely in the coming future, because then again, you never really know.
An optimistic approach is important. And not to show the world that you're optimistic towards almost everything in life. But the positivity from inside. Something that gets you to believe that you'll survive and that's why you do.

There are things you explain. And things you don't. And things you shouldn't. And then there are those you don't/shouldn't have to.
And then there are decisions you get to make and you don't. Or maybe it was your choice to begin with. But the options that become available to you are what leave you puzzled.

Sailing through it all is what's important. The journey.

"At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. Its like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now."
"I believe that believing we survive is what makes us survive."
"I've heard it's possible to grow up - I've just never met anyone who's actually done it..."

A corner of my mind : part 4

And when people form judgments, and the feeling of 'whatever' comes in your head.

They want to judge, I let them. I don't want to stand in their way. If it makes a difference to me, I'll do something to change their opinion, if not, live with it.

I had been looking for a song called, 'Torch Song' by Shady Bard since a while now, but never really found the right link to download it for some reason, considering it's not a new song! And today, when I remembered that I haven't found it still, I happened to search for it randomly and ...

I found it :D

It's like when you expect the least because you're so sick of trying, and then you get it, the feeling is different all together. Even if what I'm talking about here, is a song! But, :)

"What a time to pick a fight

The world is full of those tonight

I looked at you

You stole my life

but here it is the simple task

Save me..." 

When you're told stuff you never expected, from persons you never expected it from, or you found what you'd probably been looking for since some time now... That's the feeling I'm talking about.

:)

And,

A landlady and a maid who can't stop whining!

Ufff! Matlab, bas karo yaar! And I thought I could never reach a point of being able to let go of things, but my God, there are times like these when I realize, that there are so many people out there who take longer than I did!

People should never ever gift me chocolate!

I mean, one, you will end up eating it all by yourself because it was a gift and when you know, you stay with someone who's not very fond of chocolate as such.

And, two, it makes you fat to the extent that even if you don't mind it, someone else whose words you'd mind will come up to you and say, hello! You should mind it!

Haha.

And when I think of how well words can be put across someone, the quote that comes to my mind is,

"No amount of time with you will ever be enough but,

we'll start with forever."

And a random one that I read sometime back,

"It's like you're screaming but no one can hear. You almost feel ashamed that someone could be that important, that without them, you feel like nothing. No one will ever understand how much it hurts. You feel hopeless, like nothing can save you. And when it's over and it's gone, you almost wish that you could have all that bad stuff back so you can have the good."

Love.. Know if you're stepping or falling in it!

Birds chirping in the afternoon in the typical morning tone and I'm not kidding?

Or is that nothing unusual?

Only four more months in Mumbai :(

New people/friends towards the ending of a chapter of life. But it's always nice to meet opinionated people :)

Music videos that change your opinion on the lyrics of a song?

And just when you start to believe that you have a much clearer picture of how life's gonna go and you start to look forward to what's ahead, somebody has to mess with your head! And, literally, a somebody. And, my brain goes like, why? And who gave you the right to approach someone who matters to me and mess with his/her head in the first place?

Loud music comes to my rescue when I'm frustrated. And maybe, Word Mole? I figured the word mole game bit today though!

And, some quotes that I came across randomly, 

"At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, it's usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to remain close to, and once we've chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them. The people that are still with you at the end of the day, those are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need."

Question to self : What would make a person stick around even though he/she is greatly hurt?

"The point is we can't help who we fall in love with"

"Even now, I believe that for the most part, love is about choices. It's about putting down the poison and the dagger and making your own happy ending...most of the time. And sometimes, despite all your best intentions, fate wins anyway."

"You know as well as I do it's not about what you look like, or your job, or how successful you are. It's about having people in your life that you love and who love you...that's all that matters." 


"And the things I remember best - those are the things I wasn't supposed to do and I did them anyway. The thing is, life is too damn short to be following these rules."
~ Grey's Anatomy

Words poured

When first impressions are so pathetic.
I'm not talking about the saying, "First impressions are not always the best." But one that clears the fact that I don't even want to look at this person with another perspective or probably hear his/her side of the story. That's not me, but I didn't know there could be people who could convince me about not wanting to get to know them further at all, to this extent.

Chocolate and Music. How does one manage to blend things together to that extent and come up with something that soothes the human mind on another level?
Yes, the ingredients are simple but it's the quantity and an individual's recipe of it all that matters, ofcourse.

And sometimes, you care, maybe the least, but you do.

And you have no idea why.

And I hate packing. But I hate unpacking more. I have to pack still! The feeling of going home is simply :)

Pictures are very important to take. One can interpret that as a photograph or a painting, as I have come across people who like to make it all by themselves instead of capturing the moment by just a click :)
Not all of us choose the easiest way to create a memory that way. Because perhaps there aren't many ways to create memories after all or maybe there are too many on the contrary. But they are an essential record of a flashback of what life would look like in a tangible form. And, therefore, they are very important to be created :)

When people you barely know and don't give a crap about, somehow manage to ruin your mood - Eh?
How exactly does that happen?

I also feel, that the feeling of watching a tv show on television is very different from watching the exact same tv show on your laptop. It's like, when you know it's on your laptop, you know you can pause it, change it and not watch that particular episode, go back to the gas stove as and when you want to check if what you're making is ready and then get back to it, see the part you love over and over again, not see the part you don't like or for that matter, stop it all.
It's like it doesn't feel all that real anymore. It's like reading the pages of a book on an electronic notebook and not flipping every page of a real one which gives the feel of reading. The feeling of bookmarking a page with the bookmark you picked up from a shop and smelling the book maybe? Even though I don't read books, I guess that's what it'd feel like.
It's like being able to control life all together to the extent that you can stop it, pause it, not know it, re-live the parts you like again, and maybe not do anything about it at all at some point too.
And when you know you're watching it on television, you know there's gonna be a break and that you can probably only get back to your gas stove in that limited defined time, you can't fast forward and, you cannot go back so you might as well listen to the dialogues carefully knowing they won't be repeated.
It's a different thing when you know you have the internet and everything is available to you if you want to get back to something you missed out on when it comes to things like these.
But, you can't go back and know more or for that matter, change things done in life, in the moment. It maybe something you said, something you should have said and you didn't.

And when does the grass not seem greener on the other side? Seriously.

Soothing tune + Right lyrics = Good music?

I Was Wrong ~ Sleeperstar
Echo ~ Jason Walker
Family Tree ~ Matthew West
Turn To Stone ~ Ingrid Michaelson
Stay ~ Hurts
It Is What It Is ~ Lifehouse
I Should Go ~ Levi Kreis
Bloodstream ~ Stateless
Losing Your Memory ~ Ryan Star
Holding a Heart ~ Girl Named Toby
Here We Go ~ Mat Kearney
Only One ~ Alex Band
Say (All I Need) ~ One Republic
Longest Night ~ Howie Day
Come Back When You Can ~ Barcelona
Skinny Love ~ Birdy

Yes, those are the ones echoing in my head these days.
Taken from The Vampire Diaries, yes.
I recall the scene in my head, with a few of them.

When you're half way through your journey, it seems like you'll make it in time to the destination as per planned, but you don't know what's in, in the last bit of the journey yet!

Aah, and as I learn and progress in the area of being able to let go, I was also reminded that it is better to be surprised than to be disappointed, so expect the least? And how many times have we all heard that before? Uh yeah, it's not easy, but try harder every time you do.

"I saw you fell asleep
While you were reading
The pages on your face
You had been weeping
and I saw..."

A cop moving his hand constantly at a junction where the traffic signal is nowhere close = Usage of excess energy? Or he believed that by that movement the vehicles moved faster? #Blah

Chocolate - makes you happy and makes you wanna forget things?

When you're so caught up in your head with innumerable thoughts, you just wanna shut your eyes and not exist for a moment.

# Thunder and lightning and a pour after days of unbearable heat
~ Yes, the unpredictable weather of Mumbai drops my jaw sometimes!

When you realize you have to sit down and figure out your career plan.
# Uncertainty. In denial of things.

Ian Somerhalder. A breathtakingly amazing actor. And, I don't think I'd ever have enough of him.
Partially in love with his character, Damon Salvatore and partially with him :)

"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
"The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom."
"We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be."
"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect."
"I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you."
"We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect."

Punjabi mood?

Everyone's definition of friendship is different. It was never the way I thought it was.
You care - good. You don't care - good. You care and you show it - good.
You care and you don't care to show it - eh?

Expectation always hurts. Always. So try harder than you have been trying not to expect.

When the internet behaves properly but the websites don't?

I always enjoy being in a punjabi mood :)

Blackberry - Big, big distraction for anything.

It's just difficult to take things in sometimes. Harder than you thought it would be and way easier when you expected it to be hard.

I can be very feminist sometimes. And yes, if I were God, I would make sure that every man is a woman for atleast one day of their lives and experience all that a woman goes through. It's another thing to understand what one goes through and sort of imagine what it's like to be in that place and it's another thing to actually be there.

If you've always believed that there is someone you know, who you belong with, irrespective of this person being with you or for that matter even being a part of your life, if he/she is meant to be there with you, he/she will find a way to be. If not, it was never meant to be the way you believed it would be. Really? And I thought our actions make our destiny, little did I know it was fate that does. But then again, really?

P.S.- You never really know.

Yes, a post script in the middle. Deal with it.

Before making an effort of trying to know others, know yourself well. Atleast know yourself to the extent that you know what cheers you up.

FOOD ~ Gol gappas. Cheeseburst. Uncle Chips. Homemade chocolate cake. Ghar ki Dal Roti. Chilli chicken. Maggi. Cheese popcorn. Dairy Milk Silk. Top Ramen Curry. Chocoholic from Theobroma (Mumbai). Any ice cream in your fridge.
Now that's good stuff :)

Music usually helps in any situation. But not really always anymore.

And something that I've said much earlier as well,
Life - It's not always about the destination, but about the journey instead.

"Madame, all stories, if continued far enough, end in death, and he is no true story teller who would keep that from you." - Ernest Hemingway.

Out of a title again?

When you know you're gonna die.
When you know you're gonna be killed for something you're gonna do.
But you do it. Not for yourself, but for the others you care for, so their lives don't end up as miserable as yours did.
They can live in peace, breathe in peace, and don't have to do that basic thing, literally with somebody else's permission around.

Bol. Another movie with a message well conveyed.
But the only sad part being that it'll remain a movie with a message amongst a class of society of which a major part is not applicable for. It will never reach that part where the message is really meant to reach. Although, with positive thinking, one amongst the hundred in a theater might make the message reach where it's required.

Heart Vacancy by The Wanted - pleasant :)

Too much food is not good on a Sunday.

"Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs."

Sunday - the day of the week which is suppose to be for not doing anything. Not projects!
And that too, handwritten!

Some songs that make you believe that you will smile while crying :)
But sometimes, it isn't so.

Poetry :)

Made of Honour - I love!

Chalking out the whole plan for the rest of your life - not so good.
Not being too planned - good?

"They do not love that do not show their love." - Shakespeare.
True or untrue?

Just Mumbai

~Mumbai
a city~
that never sleeps!
Where traffic signals are followed at 7 am!
Where there really is traffic, at 7:30 am
Where rides in local buses aren't always like what you thought they'd be like
Where not travelling in local trains ever, will always leave your visit incomplete
Where strawberries in cream taste different altogether
Where there'll always be a positive vibe even when you're surrounded by all the possible negative ones
Where the wind makes you wanna believe in yourself
Where rains can have a direct or inverse relationship with your thought process
Where people are friendly
Where secrets are kept and, kept
Where the feeling of wanting to write, just comes
Where I started THIS
Where memories are built in the least time available
Where the feeling is just right
Where you admit that you know what you do
Where a journey starts and will end
Where solitude can be bliss
Where walks don't get you tired
Where simplicity drives you
Where darkness doesn't scare as much as it could
Where getting out in pyjamas doesn't feel even remotely odd
Where you want to be just yourself, all the more
Where desserts like chocoholic exist
Where being out alone at an odd hour isn't as scary as it should be
Where people make sure you call gol gappas, pani puri..!
Where love has more than one definition
A city one can never forget :)

That was SO random.
I know I have to leave Mumbai very soon.
I guess that's why all of that just came pouring.
It will be very, very hard for me to leave this city.

And, just another thing,
Letting go isn't easy but that's the only choice we have left sometimes? - very individualistic again.

I love Mumbai :)

Nonsensical?

Sometimes you're in a place for a reason, where you know you're not needed at all, but you're there.

You can't wait to get out of it but you stay because it gives somebody else the assurance that you're right there.

You're tired, you woke up early, you want to get home and there is more you can do..

But you're there for a friend. Not out of having no option but out of choice to a great extent. The friend has been there with you too when he/she wasn't getting anything by being there for you. But he/she did stay without a second thought that probably crossed your mind but never crossed his/hers :)

Tagline for Amul butter on Independence Day,

Happy Anna-dependence Day!

Amul ~ The Lokpriya Butter.

Interesting how ideas are developed in one's thoughts and how they go on to become something.

'While the whole country awaits a revolution, the only thing left for Mamta Banarjee to do, is to rename West Bengal, as Paschim Banga. Killing it.'

I mean, seriously?

Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara :)

Current obsessions : Late Goodbye by Poets Of The Fall and Good Riddance by Greenday.

Mumbai weather - Killing it! :)

I like the idea of candid photographs.

Leaving Mumbai is gonna be very hard for me :(

"I let it fall, my heart, and as it fell, you rose to claim it"

There is no time for cereal :)

Economics becomes interesting when the person explaining it to you explains it in a manner you thought you'd like.

Accounts always leaves me with a straight face.

The song/advertisement, 'Har Ek Friend Zaroori Hota Hai' by Airtel :)

Have I mentioned this quote before? ~ "Forgetfulness is a form of freedom."

It really is.

"Half the night I waste in sighs

In a wakeful dose I sorrow

For the hand, the lips, the eyes 

For the meeting of the morrow..." ~ Alfred Tennyson.

'Maybe people don't forget about you, but they forget to remember you.
People don't mean to forget.'
Really?

Some expressions that the Hindi language can convey cannot be conveyed by English. And, really.

Everything that started off badly doesn't necessarily end badly :)

We The People?

Attended a debate/discussion/tv show by NDTV, “We The People”, on the topic, 'Mumbai Terror', a while back.

People had a lot to say about,

Democracy, policies not being implemented, 80 year old spineless Prime Minister, 4500 people travelling in the local trains of Mumbai when the capacity is only 1700, who would be able to answer why Kasab is still kept healthy and alive and why exactly are we still spending endless money on that guy when it can be used for several other constructive purposes, like first aid for the victims of the Mumbai Blasts, 2011..!
Why we should vote for YOU in the first place when we don't even have the basic security expected as a citizen, 10 people dying everyday from accidents in the local trains which makes it 300 a month and therefore much more than the number that would probably die in a bomb blast...

The feeling of helplessness still remains no matter what even after a discussion/debate like that, of almost two hours.

And I cannot get over the fact as to how people can be so full of themselves and so fake at the same time.

They have a lot to say for sure, in the most manipulative ways one could, and mentioning how this person has high regards for the youth and a lot of expectations too, which she did not know how to elaborate on, when asked to, as to how is one expected to contribute at the individual level?

And yes, it was also mentioned and discussed as to how the hashtags on twitter, helped so much in passing on news and acted as a great medium of communication, which they totally did! Be it for help, for blood donation, or any other need.for.help. during the Mumbai blasts that took place on a 'Wednesday'...

Yes, the Wednesday mentioned in quotes is for a reason I'm not going to state.

Really liked how Mr. Naresh Fernandes and Mrs. Namita Devidayal, two authors, who had so much to say and made sense and stated facts in every thing they said or had an opinion about.

Towards the end, Barkha Dutt had come to talk about a story of a man, sitting there in the audience amongst us, crying, because he could not control his tears which came out because he has a brother admitted in a hospital right now, who is severely injured, from the bomb blasts that took place in Mumbai, two days ago. He said, "padhe likhe nahin hai hum, maa baap bhi nahin hai, Zaveri Bazaar mein hee kaam karte the, Jharkhand se hain, Mumbai rozi roti kamaane aaye the...

Abhi pata bhi nahi hai ki wahan kaam karne wapas jayenge ki nahi.."

That coming from an ice cream vendor who's eyes were full of tears, as politics, debate, discussion, country issues, had nothing to do with crossing his mind at that point of time, and it wouldn't cross any of ours if we were in his place too, to have someone as close as that, fighting between life and death.

Sympathizing with this man, was easy. But empathizing is what most of us can't do. Because at the end of it, we're all fine with it, in our subconscious minds, until someone close to us or someone we know goes through a tragedy like that.

It's not about anger anymore, it is the feeling of helplessness after knowing that more blasts and terror attacks are expected in Mumbai, and that we shouldn't let it become a "routine", but not being able to do anything substantial about it anyway.

The Mumbaikars have been tested about their spirits already and repeatedly.

And yes, I guess the statement is pretty much true as received in form of forwards, that says,

"Politicians divide us and terrorists unite us."
It's sad how that statement tells us that we need a bomb blast/terrorist attack for us to get hit in our heads and get that realization which we should have long ago!
Yes, at first, that statement wouldn't be interpreted as expected but I guess the sentiments behind it are sort of self explanatory.

Yes, we cannot always blame and criticize the government and the leaders/representatives all the time, and get away with it, because it's too easy an answer to give for any question. But what 'exactly' can one do at an individual level apart from holding debates/discussions in schools/colleges about such topics more often?

More than 70% of the people of the city still live in 'jhopad-pattis', and why Mumbai again?
We know some answers, we don't wish to know some and we don't wish to do anything about some.

"Trees are poems that the earth writes upon the sky. We fell them down and turn them into paper that we may record our emptiness." ~ Kahlil Gibran.

Rhythm

Restlessness.

'Hey Soul Sister' by Train.
'United State of Pop (Don't Stop the Pop)' by DJ Earworm.

Coke.
Confessions of a Shopaholic.
Vegetable atta noodles.

Entourage.
Blank.
Alarm.
A loud alarm sorta scaring you when you wake up.
College timings suck.
Wet hair.
Curly uncombed hair looking nice :)
Rain.
More rain.
More, more rain.
Water logging in areas.
But when you're home, it seems all good from the huge window, unless you're out there in dirty puddles.
Marine drive :)
But, marine drive with dark brown colored water! :/

Waffles :D
Music!

I love pancakes too.
Uncertainty about whether you know people around you or not. Really.
Not wanting to have healthy food. But, junk. *straight face.
Cab/taxi takes away SO much money!
Chocolate. Chocoholic :D

But, the cold and wet feeling :/
And and and,
Not wanting to do anything at all!
I'm a lazy, lazy person.

'Give me a sign' by Breaking Benjamin.
'Iridescent' by Linkin Park.

Over-thinking.
Feelings coming back.
Lyrics.
Epiphany?

Fooood :D

No dreams.
Blank dreams?
Vague dreams?

Unexpected reminders about things/people in life as if the universe is conspiring against you :/
Peppy songs cheering you up :)
The weather making you active instead of lethargic?
Soothing songs :)

Earphones starting to behave weirdly and not work properly can be depressing!

And,
"Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung."
"Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis."
"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."
"I don't even butter my bread, I consider that cooking."

A corner of my mind : part 3

There are a lot of people out there who cannot convey the right tone of what they're trying to say when they're chatting or rather writing to one for that matter, to get their message across.

There is that age, and maybe not exactly teenage, but a little ahead of that, where you see people in this phase of their lives where materialism holds a lot of importance, more than the usual amount, and that any tangible thing/a present, makes a lot more difference than anything original as such.
Like you'd do anything at all at a certain age to get what you want.
And when you know that the person has enough brains to probably do really, really well academically, but is not intelligent enough to apply some of it in his/her real life. That's when it gets funny.

Taking/choosing different paths/routes to get to the same destination.
Be it on a daily basis, in terms of means of transport, or the journey of life.

Some photographs speak more than what the person in it could have possibly told you in person.
But some don't remotely tell what was expected to be told.

The wind :)

'Rolling in the Deep' is a very, very well sung song by Adele, with the lyrics saying it all!

Economics : Where one states the obvious in innumerable ways in a manipulative manner by assuming more than required, and, not applying a reasonable percentage of it anywhere in life. 

It's always been about marks, it is still about marks and it will always be about marks. 

When you have 16 *huge* gol gappas after writing on that subject, now that's what you call contentment! :D 

Pasta that you cooked yourself and Friends on your laptop is sometimes what you really tend to enjoy doing, the whole Sunday :) 

I feel like applauding at some people's state of minds at some point of time. 

And,

"A pessimist is a person who looks both ways before crossing a one way street."

"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good."

"Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome."

"The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault."

"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't."

A week day narrated on a weekend?

It is an ugly fact that we can't be ourselves all the time. At some point, someday, we'll be hurt because of what we'll be told about ourselves which ends up ruining other people's moods. It might be a habit, an incident that made you react like that, a reaction of yours to someone else's behaviour.

It's not good when people know too much about you, because then, it's not hard for them to guess what's bothering you, at most point of times!

The concept of deaf and dumb children being taught how to sing the National Anthem left me speechless with my heart pumping extra blood into my body with immense satisfaction.
And a reminder for the world in the end which said,
"Desh Bhakti ki koi bhasha nahi hoti"
Saw that video on the theater screen, when I'd gone to see Shaitan.

Shaitan - realistic!

When you're in a taxi all alone and, it's raining and you're stuck in traffic, even though, for a very little while, and there's silence and, all you can hear is the rain and vehicles honking, you can hear yourself breathing and your heart sort of starts to beat slowly?

India : a country of minorities?

Anjuman-I-Islam School, a Muslim school I visited the other day with a friend of mine for some work.
..So many formalities for all the people currently applying for junior college in any college of Mumbai. The School is one of the centers for the formalities and procedure to apply for admissions.
A man who had been standing there since a really, really long time, had come for the second time for his son's admission formalities, all the way from Afghanistan! We wondered why though.

"Friends" : the tv show - IS a stress buster! :)

Some people can really get you to hate them and that's a good thing if it works because that's what you need, sometimes.

The songs : 'Where Them Girls At' and 'Bhaag D.K. Bose, Aandhi Aayi' are peppy! :D
And, 'See You Soon' by Coldplay ... :)

Sometimes, you make a choice and you get onto a particular path, and it might be something as petty as choosing the means of transport to get home, that is, by train, or cab...
You can be thinking about the time factor, the money factor, the marine-drive-view-that-you'll-miss factor and any other factor that could possibly cross your mind!
But yeah, sometimes, you shouldn't over think so much, just like the way I did, by writing all of that up there.
You should just go with the flow, and do what your mind says at that particular point of time, because it's good not to reason out sometimes and not do what you should and instead what you'd do otherwise.
It's like not choosing what it should be but what it is.
And someone might get to relating this to something like, not being with who you should be but with who you are. And, the chain of thought goes on.

And,
"There are no facts, only interpretations."
"Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."
"Try to learn something about everything and everything about something."
"The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it."
"An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered, an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered."

Everybody should have a Bucket List :D

When it feels strange

I think the wind gets you to fall in love with the idea of love.

Sometimes you do the most obvious things right in the end, like you expected yourself to do it at first as well, but for some complete goddamn odd reason, you don't and then you end up doing it in the end, when it doesn't make much sense to you and you know it, but you still do it.

The feeling when you can't get yourself to snap out of things that fast.

When you have already looked from the other person's point of view, and you're not remotely convinced with the reasons/explanation, but you still make another effort to look again, and it hurts you a little this time, when you didn't expect yourself to have hurt this person you might have said something to, although, in a not-so-serious manner.

..Hurting at points when more than you thinking, you kinda knew it wouldn't even prick you, but it did.

I guess just like the way there is a very small line between confidence and over confidence, there is also a very small difference between telling someone, "Dude, I don't think that's right" or, "Dude, I think that's wrong"

Wrong is another strong word used by most of us pretty often but when we say, "I don't think that's right", the message really being conveyed here by us, is more like you know,
'Generally, there is more than one option to go about things, and probably the one that you might have considered/chosen is not one of the appropriate ones.'

By saying, "I think that's wrong", we are guaranteeing this person, that,

'There is no way in hell that you're even close to right.'

Death doesn't feel good when you have unfinished business left.. right?

I mean who wouldn't have that to do? But then again, we aren't warned for more than half the things coming our way in life.

I wrote most of that on my phone at 6:30 in the morning a day back.

I don't usually have that much to say at that hour of the morning.

But yeah, there are always firsts :)

And, some that I came across and liked,

"Law is mind without reason."

"Political correctness is tyranny with manners."

"You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality."

"When one person suffers from a delusion it is called insanity, when many people suffer from a delusion it is called religion."

"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."

"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on."

Thoughts. Just thoughts, of people and maybe, me.

A verse from the poem, 'To You' by Walt Whitman,

"You have not known what you are, you have slumber'd upon yourself all your life 

Your eyelids have been the same as closed most of the time 

What you have done returns already in mockeries 

The mockeries are not you 

Underneath them, and within them, I see you lurk." 

I like it. A lot.

And the movie, 'Leaves of Grass'

:) 

I saw a boy riding a bicycle the other day. It was raining. He was riding it with one hand and he held an umbrella in the other, and had an unusual confidence on his face, with earphones in his ears as well!

It was a good sight, one of those rare ones, which get a smile on your face for no particular reason, but you feel positive energy being transferred to you in an eccentric manner.

And,

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

And I wonder if I've mentioned a few of my favourite lines here earlier.

"Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all. Travelling the road between who you think you are and who you can be. The key is to allow yourself to make the journey."

I believe we are solely responsible for our happiness or sadness. It is we, who called for it, it is we who attract it to ourselves and it is we who have given the authority to someone else to decide 'our' happiness or sadness. Yes, it isn't a permanent situation but a state of mind. But it starts with us and comes back to us.

"And the air was full of Thoughts and Things to Say. But at times like these only the Small Things are ever said. The Big Things lurk unsaid inside."

~ The God of Small Things

I am my shadow

Old songs.
The air talking to you.
The positive feeling about absolutely nothing.
The pleasant weather making you feel better from inside.
When you listen to a particular song after really long, Time After Time ~ Quietdrive
When you feel like telling people around you, 'Be careful who you pretend to be because I'd hate if you forgot who you are.' I guess I've written that line here before, but, I like to repeat certain things, sometimes.

There is no alternative for Maggi :D

In love with the idea of love? Really?
My Love - Sia
Satellite Heart - Anya Marina
Metric - All yours - Emily Haines

"It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not." ~ Unknown

Arbitrary

When it hurts more than you thought it would.
When it didn't hurt at all, and you thought you'll cry, to say the least.

When people treat hotel waiters/waitresses like their personal servants. When the waiter/waitress at a hotel is looked down upon because of the job performed by him/her. He/she is talked to and ordered, as if they were one's personal servants/maids, for crying out loud. I absolutely hate it.
Hate it when people behave/talk like that. I do not like such people.

When people's moods/vibes get onto you!

When you can not, just can not control your tears any longer. They are right there and can pour out any second.

When you know, that now, it feels just right.

Punjabi : the language, the weddings, and, the songs :)

Daughters being considered a liability from the very beginning and the whole system which can never be changed. A girl born and brought up to put mehendi on her hands and get married, sooner or later. The society doesn't let one live in peace, although, we constitute this society ourselves.

Everyone is living for the society. I've barely come across people who would get up in the morning, get ready and look into the mirror and say, I look good today because I feel good and the I feel satisfied to an extent because the reason I wanted to wear this particular thing/dress, is because 'I' wanted to, because I like it and that I've dressed up for myself and not for the world.
We all live in a world full of people pretending to be somebody they're not and we become one of those people, at one point of time too. Yes, the original line is from the movie, A Cinderella Story, but the line just crossed my mind right now, somehow.
Instead, people wear what others would like to see them wear, be someone they're not so someone could be deceived by believing the lie.

MUSIC = BLISS.
Broken - Lifehouse
If I fall in love with you again - Glass Pear
Hanging by a moment - Lifehouse
Stop Standing There - Avril Lavigne
Possibility - Lykke Li

"Can't raise a toast? Try Butter" ~ One of the few taglines from the advertisement of 'Amul Butter'..! Haha.

Obsession with the character of Edward Cullen, and the marginal utility not decreasing even remotely after watching 'Twilight', over and over and over again.

And,
..No matter how much you plan in life,
Life has its own plan for you..

Love.. Not?

When you start to cheat on someone, or you already have been, there comes a point when one must get themselves to question, as to why things are, as they are, today. Reasoning out is very important. Getting to the introspection mode and realizing, is important, sometimes. Things need to be rubbed onto our face, as a reminder sometimes, even though we know it all, somewhere deep down inside us.
What was the reason you fell in love with that person in the very first place? You've 'lost' that love is all you tell yourself. But really?

A lot of us fall in love, more than just once. And your love for the guy you first fell for, would never die, until you die. That is, if you believe and know, it was true and that you'd never had stronger feelings before. Your love for the guy you're yet to meet, would only be stronger :)
When you step/fall in it again, when it's time and when things are in place in your life, probably then, it would only be as good or only better than the first.

The book of life is made by our actions but some things are pre-decided. And, considering no one knows the next page of this book, we should really try and live through it all. I mean, what if God has something really nice in store for me/you in the future?

And, some very interesting quotes in my opinion, by 'bclocale' on twitter,

- There is a great need for sarcasm font.

- The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to let them.

- Is a fly without wings called a walk?

- Buy land. They've stopped making it.

- If you believe everything you read, you better not read.

- Opinions are like feet. Everybody's got a couple, and they usually stink.

- People never grow up, they just learn how to act in public.

- If love is blind then how can there be love at first sight?

- Wouldn't it be a good idea to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?

- Why are lawyers not sworn to tell the truth like all the witnesses in a jury trial?

- If God created everything, who created God?

- There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

- I can resist everything except temptation.

- Want to relieve some stress? Make up a language and ask people for directions. 

'Falling in Love' and 'Addicted to Love' are names of two movies.

Weird much? 

And, I guess, at the end of it all, you don't get to choose love, it chooses you.

Out of words?

Mood swings.
Inexplicable emotions.
Unreasonable anger.
Love found.
Heart lost.
Heart not back.
Incessant unfinished thoughts.
Patience.
Priorities.
And as a friend of mine puts it, time is one heck of a hurricane.

You don't always get the best photographs and it's not always what it looks like. It's not always what you see. It's not always what you hear. It's not always what you are made to believe.

Sometimes, it takes longer to figure it all out, longer than you thought it would really take.
We'll know someday.

People around you and, their negative vibes seem to get onto you, to an unbearable and intolerable extent.

And then, from Grey's Anatomy,

"We are born, we grow up and then we die. But not in the same order. Some are born old. Some are living dead and some are always growing up. But that's what life is all about...

As unpredictable as the heartbeat of a person."

Or its, "We're born, we live, we die. Sometimes not necessarily in that order. We put things to rest, only to have them rise up again. So if death isn't the end, what can you count on anymore? Because you sure can't count on anything alive. Life is the most fragile, unstable, unpredictable thing there is. In fact, there's only one thing in life that we're sure of - It ain't over, till it's over."

Some things seem to grow on us in life. Be it a picture, a song, a dress, or a human being for that matter.

Also, some people's silence kills faster than their words!

Alas.

The things we lose always have a way of coming back to us in the end. Really? 

Empathy

Life is beautiful and things do not happen for a reason, however, it is the results which follow the event that reason out our understanding of what they mean, why they have reason to be, what they are, and, how they have come into existence.

The above lines, written by a person called, Jeev Sahni, and taken from,
http://thenehafoundation.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=56&Itemid=77

They are put very aptly and are applicable to a lot of situations in daily life.
But they remind me of one thing in particular every time I read them, and that is,
I do not believe in the statement, 'Everything happens for a reason.'
I don't. I just don't. And, I never would.

Emphatic listening is something a lot of us don't do and we must. We must. To lend a ear to merely hear, express sympathy, say what you have to without making sure the other person understood or cared to listen to what you had to say, is nothing unusual and most definitely not enough.

To be able to keep yourself in the other person's shoes and imagine what its like to be where he/she is and what he/she is going through, now thats what's called, an understanding listener.
And then, as rightly said by Ernest Hemingway, "When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen."

There are always two or more than two sides of a story. By being judgmental and passing a conclusion after hearing one side only, speaks a lot about your thought process itself.

I love the way the song, 'I Belong To You' by Muse, starts!
The tune, in the beginning :)
The lyrics are decent though.
Oh and, 'Over My Head (Better Off Dead)' and, 'Always' by Sum 41 ~ I like.

It is time to let go, sometimes.

You know what I mean

So, a point to be noted ~

Why is a gathering often addressed as, "Ladies and Gentlemen"..?
Really. Why exactly the word 'gentle' for the men and no such adjective before the word, ladies?
Now to that, if one says, "Ladies and Men would sound too odd.. right?"
I'd know its a male saying it! Haha :P Or maybe, it would. But again, is that fair enough?

Quotealicious on twitter states the obvious, in a different manner. And, it really is true to its core, pretty often. And, one can relate to most of it, with their individual lives. So yeah.

Some thoughts/quotes by her shared on twitter,

- Somewhere between laughing for no reason, making fun of each other, and calling each other names, I sorta fell for you.
- I remember when I was a kid I went on the computer just to use paint.
- you are my hardest goodbye
- If it's meant to be, it’s meant to be. No matter how long it takes.
- I think it's fearless to fall for your best friend, even though he's in love with someone else
- Finding yourself subconsciously singing a song you hate.
- Remember it's one thing to say I love you. It's another thing to actually mean it.
- That one song on your iPod that you always skip but never delete
- She ignores all the other guys who want her, because she's too busy noticing him.
- I absolutely love listening to the pouring rain
- Your first love, is the hardest to get over. You feel like you'll never fall in love again. But when you do, its just as good, if not, better ~ Ke$ha.


Random. Happy. Not for any particular reason. But, just positive, maybe.
Shared those, because, just felt like. I'm sure a lot others who might read this, would be able to relate to it too. Yes, mostly girls would be able to though. Oh and twitter is good!
I like twitter :D

The movie, 'Its A Boy Girl Thing'..
Saw it today. Pretty decent. Missed the beginning though. But, it was nice actually. Yes, boys/men wouldn't like it, under normal circumstances. Or maybe exceptions would.
Am I being too feminist today? I think so. Maybe, I am. It's the mood :)

Two very, very important conclusions :
1. Google is God.
2. Music is Oxygen.

Oh and the poem, 'Anyway' by Mother Teresa...
It has these positive vibrations, somehow. I mean, atleast, every time, I read it, it just feels . . .
weirdly different?

And, I feel like quoting that here too. Yes, too much of quoting.

"People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered,
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives,
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies,
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you,
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight,
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous,
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow,
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough,
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God,
It was never between you and them anyway."

Hinglish!

On the 13th of April, I went to a chemist shop with my mom which was right opposite the Doc's clinic.
And, looking at it from a distance, both of us could see a small boy.
A boy who looked a little weak, had a stern look on his face, and was small to the extent that more than half of his body, was hidden by the table infront of him.
My mom's confused expressions did tell me that she wondered if the boy was gonna be giving the medicines to us. I had some sorta confidence in the boy and I told mom, woh ladka hai na.

When we reached the counter, the boy looked at us and didn't utter a word.
We asked, medicines aap denge na? The boy nodded, simply.
We gave him the prescriptions.  He took them with a lot of confidence and very quickly, he grabbed all the medicines. As he started to write the bill, manually, I asked him, naam kya hai aapka? He said, Tarun.
I said, kaun si class mein ho? He said, 8th. I said, padh ne ke saath saath yahan kaam bhi karte ho? He said, haan.

Mujhe mann mein ek ajeeb si khushi bhi hui aur pata nahi kyun, par bura bhi laga.
He started to calculate the total by adding up the prices in the calculator. By the time, he was just about done calculating, the senior guy (probably the owner of the hop) arrived. He asked him, ho gaya beta total?

The confidence on Tarun's face left me smiling until I walked to the car.


I just wrote a very normal incident up there that has probably taken place in most of our lives. But it just feels good to have a record of something like that, even though, I have most of it in my head anyway.

It isn't what people said, it's also what they thought instantly to what you said. What they finally did end up saying out loud, as a response to what you had to say, is another story all together.
A lot of times, we don't know, either because we probably never asked, or we never bothered to know, what could have been the thing that, that person was about to say initially, instead of what he/she actually did end up saying, in the end. And, in my opnion, that does matter.
Usse us insaan ke chain of thought ke baare mein bohot kuch samajh ne ko milta hai.

A lot of people who want/need a change, don't/won't.
And the ones who shouldn't because all of us, really are, unique in our own special ways, change faster than time passes.

People alive today, need to really, really start looking from the other person's point of view!
Atleast before they pass a conclusion about a story, in which, they're aware of only one side of it!

Momentous anger and saying things, which would be taken to heart by the other person, even before the speaker ends up realizing what they really said!!

Three other awesome songs by Akcent, apart from, That's My Name,
Stay With Me
My Passion
Love Stoned

And, Glass Pear :
No reason to love
Loveable
Streets Of Love

Bohot sahi gaane hain! :D

Sakaraatmak soch : Positive thinking!
A compulsory lecture for five hours, under the CS orientation programme. Seriously!
*phew* I come home and there is no elctricity and the inverter got burnt! Aur, mujhe gussa nahi aaya! :O
Haha :D

A quote by Quotealicious on twitter :
"And just when I think I might finally be over him... He starts talking to me."

'Te Amo' : Weirdly nice song.
A song from a hindi movie, Dum Maro Dum. Not the Rihanna version :P Actually, Rihanna's version is pretty decent too.

No Reservations : I like the movie. A lot :)

Baghban - Ek aisi movie jise dekh ne ke baad, aakhon se aasoon aa hee jaate hain.

Lekin ek baat sach hai, jisse ham mein se kaafi waakif nahi hain, ki,
Zindagi ki jo kitaab hai, uska har panna alag hai, aur har panne ko likhne mein hamara bohot bada yogdaan hai.
There are a lot of people out there who believe in what pandits have to say about their future and they start to  perform their life's deeds as per what they're told. That is the absolute wrong thing to do!
Koi hamein yeh nahi batayega ki hamein apni zindagi kaise jeeni hai.

Umeed har insaan karta hai. Kuch apne aap se aur bohot zyada, doosron se. Mere ek acche dost, aur mera yeh maan na hai, ki umeed karna hee, apne aap mein ek guna hai.

Bohot baar ham apni taraf se effort karte hain, ek relationship ko kaayam rakhne ke liye.
Bohot baar hamein yeh bhi lagta hai, ki woh effort sirf ham kar rahe hain, and that's when it hurts.
When you expected someone to go out of their way to do something for you, and they remotely didn't, that's when it hurts.
Jab aap ne ek insaan ke liye apne parents se ladai ki, and coming to think of it, aap aisi kisi cheez ke liye, shayad apne aap ke liye bhi argue na karte, lekin aapne apne is dost ke liye ki, and the friend doesn't give a shit, that's when it hurts.
When you've been told by a stranger who believes, he/she has the ability to see someone's future and you're told that you wouldn't make it very high in life, that's when it hurts.
When you know your heart isn't with you, and you really did give it away to somebody, but you never got it back, and you lack the ability to give a damn if someone else has the same to tell you, because your heart isn't with you still, that's when it hurts.
We can never, ever repay our parents for all that they do for us, and so, at every point we get angry, we should really make the effort and must not lack the ability to look from the other person's point of view.
Its a different story when we're not convinced but coming to think of it, we do lot of things in life, even when we're not 'really' convinced.
Communication gap is another mistake committed by most of us.

All the above typed in the above paragraph, in two languages, hindi and english, has been stated in general. There isn't a hidden story behind the points. I was reminded of a few points after seeing the movie and I felt like typing it down, out here, so here I am.

I was appreciated lately, for the posts written by me here, and it felt good. Really good :)
Thank you.


P.S. - You really can't hum while holding your nose. Try it!

A corner of my mind : part 2

Death.
It'll come to you one day.
If you escape it, it'll chase you.
If you escape it again, it'll chase you still.
Until, its finally got you.
Is it?

Risk of trying a second cucumber piece knowing the first was absolutely bitter!
Now that's a risk. It is. But isn't that big. Really? Can you really say it isn't that big a risk, knowing you might just ruin your taste in the middle of having your favourite sabzi or dal..? But then again, it's tempting. Right? A cucumber piece (absolutely healthy) with salt and red chilli powder on it..! :D Hmm, it reminds me of how things can be so tempting from outside, but you don't know what's in until you've stepped inside, you know. Somehow, the looks have been proved to be deceptive more than often. But one can't be so negative from the very beginning thinking it isn't worth stepping in. Nahin?

*devil mood* :D

Umm,
New lip balms are kinda exciting :D

BlackBerry advertisements getting innovative day by day! :)

And and and,
Anna Hazare ofcourse! :D

Kurtis :D

I still fit into size 'S' :D Sometimes!

And,
Friends make a HUGE difference in our lives?
Yes, I have a habit of stating the obvious. :P


P.S. - "If you give off signals that you don't want to belong, people will make sure that you don't."

Uhh yeah

A friend told me the other day and I quote,
'At the edge of all light, when you know you are at the very edge, have faith that either you will be caught when you fall or you will be taught to fly. Have faith.'
That is a very positive thought. Ain't it? :)

A lot of times, most of us manage to tell the others to look around more positively, but when it comes to applying that to ourselves, it doesn't really work. Does it? Actually, it doesn't work at all. The same goes for the friend who tried to make me look around things a little more positively than I already do, and it goes for me too.

Another awesome song by Glass Pear - Say It Once. :)
And yes, I do wonder a lot of times as to why I hadn't heard certain songs before...
But then again, because I wasn't meant to?

Vailati pee gaye par desi abhi baaki hai :D
Char baj gaye lekin party abhi baaki hai..!
Peppy song. Nai? Hindi is a very expressive language! And, I am a punjabi by heart :D


Books. I mean, textbooks. Not novels!
Tv. But no good movie coming on tv. Friends. Changing?

Also, I was told that, "If friendship is your weakest point then you are the strongest person in the world."
I mean, ofcourse its a quote by Abraham Lincoln. But really??

Uh, are we all dying on 21st December, 2012?

Random. Random-er. Random-est?

Yellow.
The colour. The song. Taxi. No parking board. Light. The horizon line with a tinge of orange. Happiness. Really?

Losing a friend. In real. All of a sudden.

Cost and worth are two very different things.
There are times, when you cannot be seeing the cost of a thing, but, if it's worth losing out on, what you would lose out on, if you don't pay that cost.

It's said that, watching a setting sun depresses you, but what is said is not always true. Just like the way people believe photographs but don't believe paintings, always.

Oh and the lesser you know the merrier you are, undoubtedly. 

Chocolate over Chocolate is bliss. :)

Reckless. And not wanting to be right always.

When your lips are dry and really dry, and you have lip balm with you somewhere around, but you wouldn't put it, not because you're lazy, but because you want the dryness to remain for a while. As if it helps you remain blank in your head for a while. Weird much?

The world becomes a smaller place when you get out of a boarding school!

Sadi Gali and punjabi songs :D

When there are things you know and you like the fact that you know them because they make you feel better, but you can't do anything about them, or maybe you just won't because it won't be the same then.


And ... 

The tune 'Endless Goodbye' in the Airtel's advertisement is very soothing :)

Just sentences?

1st March :
Uhh yeah.
Music and My Diary... are :)
I lost a friend. A good friend.
I miss home. Terribly.
Exams and a landlady who couldn't get more inconsiderate!
Mumbai never changes. And yeah, that's a good thing. But I don't feel like using an emotican here for some reason.
Therefore, *smile.

You make me feel better. Some people do :)

♪ After tonight, who knows where we'll be tomorrow
What if we're never here again?

Show Me What I'm Looking For, Need You Now, Ours and, So Contagious = I love.


13th March :
Too much to say.
Avril Lavigne's most amazing songs :
I Love You, Everybody Hurts, and, Not Enough.

When you're hurt to the extent that your judgment for once has been so wrong that you have never felt your heart sink so low before that apart from being speechless, your tears flow out like they have only twice before like that, in life. When you didn't know you could be this wrong about judging people around you, you thought you knew well.

-BLANK-

HATE.
But one sentence for now,
Being yourself ALL THE TIME isn't easy.