The magic is in the mess

"It is an ancient need to be told stories. But the story needs a great storyteller." - Alan Rickman
#Always

It's one thing to have priorities clear,
it's another to know how different yours are from the selfless people

I consider myself fortunate that I've had the opportunity to meet some fantastic people in my life so far already
You have to be brutally honest only with those who understand honesty!
You have to colour your words with the rest.
- said to me by a very wise fifty-six-year-old independent woman living life on her own terms :)

Look around! Learn a little (even when there is a lot to) from those who're doing it without what you have! Seriously!

When you attend one of the simplest weddings ever
No showoff culture equals no punjabis criticising the food/arrangements/clothes/people's dress sense and more
When there really was so much happiness in the air that one could sense the good vibe with smiling faces all around you
Love marriages are always about struggle, aren't they?
This one could've helped an individual grow one's faith exceptionally though

The definition of travelling is so messed up in our culture/society
Staying in the five star hotels and eating food from restaurants present all across the world
Really? What did you learn? That it's all the same everywhere?
You could do that in your own city and not look outside the window of the hotel room. Haha!
[It's like someone gifting you an electronic gadget on a particular occasion, and in your head you're like; it could've been bought at any point of time after saving up enough; you didn't manufacture it, did you? So what was your (not the money's) effort in it? Yes, I'm weird.]
We don't know our own country well but we love to comment on it every now and then
Trying the local cuisines, using the public transport, exploring an area, that's what it's supposed to be all about!

And,
I have to mention this;
My friend, who is now a mother to a nine months old,
inspires me with her take on motherhood!
She is a rare example in this generation for those of us who haven't walked on her path yet.
And because it kills me a little every single time I see people around me confident that there is nothing that they could possibly learn of/from...
She is the complete opposite of that :)

Life can be as messed up as you make it.
You'll be surrounded by people at one point, and feel like there isn't a single person who's like you and then you'd have one person miles away understanding that there's something not right, just by the punctuation used in your sentences.

You're making fun of someone and you don't mean to hurt that person at all? Fair enough. Keep that person's nature in mind before doing anything. Things that don't hurt you, won't hurt them either : is the worst assumption ever. You don't know that what you're saying or doing would or wouldn't hurt them. I just fail to understand why people keep taking others around them for granted.

You have to keep your freaking equation right with some people, because you're stuck there, and for that, you have to be fake
One of the most difficult things for me to do
Why do we humans complicate everything?
Why can't people just get it? You're a certain way for a reason, and you reacted a certain way for a reason (no, the humans who don't think before opening their mouth aren't included in this list)
You want something, you want something
You love someone, you love someone
Since when did it all become about approval and agreeing with each other's opinions?
You are different god dammit. Ofcourse you wouldn't like what I like or who I like.
But why exactly is that important?
The biggest problem with us humans is; one half is seeking for validation, and the other half thinks they must validate it because it's their basic right and they were born to do just that.
There are such few people out there who actually let you be. Whoever you are, and however you are, they let you be. There is no effort needed with these people. No effort to make a conversation, no effort to laugh/smile. It's effortless because you can share silence with them without thinking even for a second that it could be awkward. These are the kind of people who get you. And most times, one doesn't find such people easily. Because you know, it can't be all that easy.

"If you are like most people, then like most people, you don't know you're like most people."

Selfish. That's what we all are.
We want things our way. We discount other's feelings on the account that it's okay to, because we have problems too. Umm, hello.. We all have problems, and unconditional love is too rare, and it doesn't work the way you think it will.

"Our culture has accepted two huge lies. The first is that if you disagree with someone's lifestyle, you must fear or hate them. The second is that to love someone means you agree with everything they believe or do. Both are nonsense. You don't have to compromise convictions to be compassionate."

Whenever you think how messed up life is for you,
always remember that there are people hoping they manage to get past just one more day without any more troubles.

"You should always have an opinion" is the most bizarre statement I've heard!

Mad World - Hardwell
Starlight (Could You Be Mine) - Don Diablo & Matt Nash
Waiting for Love - Avicii
Strong Ones - Armin van Buuren
Young Again - Hardwell
#music

When you've also been blessed enough to have a friend who writes to you like one would to one's diary :)

An eighty-three-year-old lady with more strength than I've seen in most people
When the closest person to her passed away forty years ago
and she also lost a child of hers eventually
She's someone who's really felt loss
And I'm a firm believer of the fact that one has to face real loss in life, to get out of their bubble
Oh yes, we're all in our own bubbles

The ones who have lesser than us tend to give more than us. It's true!
The driver named Vicky, gave away his bag of peanuts to the boy who asked for food at the window of the car..
And even though I wished I'd have had something edible with me (like in Bombay; Gems) on that day, but I didn't and he did.

It is important to keep meeting people who are different from you!
(for your own personal growth in many ways..)
The reason behind that thought is a girl I met, a few months back, someone very ambitious, who told me about a story of a person who lived in the slums of Mumbai and got through the Stanford MBA on one hundred percent scholarship! People like those are the ones setting examples for the rest of us.

HDFC Life Ad Campaign
~ Another wonderful advertisement :)

Because I started working with an NGO recently...
(yes, it is supposed to be 'an' NGO and not 'a' NGO
The articles are used before an abbreviation/word depending on the pronunciation of the first alphabet in that particular word! Phonetically, yes. So, because in this abbreviation, the N is pronounced as enn, which again begins with a vowel, therefore the 'an'. Haha. Yes, let's face it that we've all wondered about this at some point in our lives before.)

Going back to my primary thought,
Because I started working with an NGO recently;
Make A Difference
The experience so far has obviously been enlightening!
My next post will be only about that :)

There's a part of me that can't wait for the next chapter of my life to begin, a part of me that wants to be there for these kids in many ways, for as long as possible, and a part that wants to go away.

Because it is the people of Mumbai who make it Bombay :)
In their Marathi, the sorted!, the obvious vada pav
The food that added to my happiness:
Chicken Tikka roll from Sigdi, Chip Butty from Theobroma, Sardar Pav Bhaji (no, it's not meant for you if you're not a street food person or if you're concerned about your immunity getting disturbed because of all the butter and the utensils used) and the gol gappe from Right Place (Amarsons)

The typical business class families have so much to learn from the middle class. So much!
It just amazes me every single time I see a confident individual around, and most of the times, the confidence is backed by the wealth inherited. Haha. I find that hilarious.

Because good food makes life better!
And so does Chai :)

"Human beings are works in progress that mistakenly think they're finished."
- Daniel Gilbert

PS- Happy New Year :)

Untitled

When you can't believe people's actions sometimes
Not the words
Those things are not to be paid much attention to in reality anyway
But wow
Contradiction is intriguing
No kidding!

But let's agree once again to the universal fact that we're all aware of;
When we care the most, we get hurt the most.
It consumes me.

When your memory gets refreshed in terms of what it's like to travel in a PACKED local in the peak hours of the morning!
Yup, by local, I do mean the local train!
And even in that situation when you can pretty much not move at all and are stuck..
You will find people with a smile on their face
#ObsessedWithMumbai

Sometimes, you do things.. Things you know are not going to favour you in any way at all..
But you do them anyway
It won't get you any satisfaction either, and you know it
On the contrary, it might hurt you, in ways you're not sure of, but because you know the cost that the other person might be paying in terms of loss.. and isn't realizing any of it right now, purely because of not thinking of the big picture.. You go ahead and you do something, putting your foot down and because you know you can work your way with words to a reasonably good extent, you knew you'd succeed.. and so, you did
You don't think about 'your' fayeda/nuksaan in these situations
You're being selfless and spending your time and thoughts over conveying something that is never going to benefit you, ever

When the song, 'Last Day of Your Life' plays on your phone on shuffle mode :)
#GlassPear #ExceptionalSong

I guess I could never get enough of Bombay
I could have how much ever possible but it still wouldn't be enough.. ever
Yup, same thing said in two ways
Deal with it.

When you go back to College and see that the way your favourite sandwich used to be made has become all fancy now!
And of course it brings back memories
Not just of the obvious times of catching a movie right after the last lecture got over at 10:30 in the morning!
But also of the solitary moments you did have in the cafeteria on a day when it may have been raining like 'cats and men' and not everyone landed up for lectures like you did (at least till the second year of College)..! Haha.

The boy trying to sell umbrellas :)

#Hope
#NotGivingUp
#MumbaiDiaries








Mumbai won't be Mumbai without its people
The originality of thought
The not-bothering-you, but happy-to-help attitude
I haven't seen it in any other city amongst the ones I've travelled to, in our country
It's amazing how it works and how it doesn't
How the pace of life is set and it's a learning even as a mere observer at all times
Too much to gather
#MumbaiDiaries

And here's an awesome post ~
The truth about Mumbai! :)

"Sometimes the simplest things are the most craftily constructed and the most complicated to pull off."
"Words scream to be heard. Silence waits to be understood."
"The best thing about a picture is that it never changes, even when the people in it do."
"We ache to make the world of feelings a language we can converse in."
"Love is a question of how you look at it."

"If it weren't for the fact that the TV set and the refrigerator are so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any exercise at all."
"When an email comes to you saying, 'Click here to check your IQ', that you guys is your IQ test."
"Pardon my language but a man who shits and pees in a Rs. 32 lakh loo will never understand what a tanking rupee means for a common man."

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity."

Kafila:
White women in the Indian imagination ~ Alexandra Delaney

"The debate is still raging as to what is more difficult - to understand women or to book a ticket through IRCTC."
"I have been through a lot." - All cars

Coldplay - The Scientist (Dimitri Vangelis & Wyman Remix)
#ObsessedWithThisVersion

Even I want Chai and pakodas in this mad baarish!!
#LuxuriesOfBeingHomeThatISincerelyMiss

"Grammar. The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit."

Bits, pieces and more

Opinions
are never right or wrong (as I may have even mentioned here earlier)
But what doesn't fail to amuse me is the level of variation in them on the same subject!
The difference in the intensities of the opinions leading to depths headed in two different directions,
on one subject!
Irrespective of looking from the other person's perspective, there is a big chance you're still not close to his/her chain of thought
It's not about not being able to really put yourself in his/her shoes any more, you already did that bit (if at all you did), it's about not being able to think beyond it
Maybe there is a possibility, that the other person is simply unable to express the unsaid words in any other form as well
And of course, silence is misinterpreted. More than the expected number of the times.
But then again, that's the beauty of human evaluation I guess

At the end of it all, it does come down to how YOU look at it.

The worst part is when we forget things
A crying baby on a flight
Everyone would turn back and stare at the parent and pass all the possible comments capable of crossing one's mind, as to why the parent can't keep the child, freaking quiet!
But I doubt the probability being high, of people thinking beyond
Beyond the perspectives of the parent
Beyond the ideology of taking care of a child
Beyond the faults of nobody

The difference between the reel and the real world even in terms of the one we're living in!
Not just the one in Bollywood
The picture is always something else than the one being shown to us
#Automobile #Dealerships

The mixed signals are in a language I don't understand and he's the only one who has the translation dictionary.
#Dialogue

I love Ryan Atwood.
#TheOC #BenjaminMcKenzie

The Great Gatsby.
He looked at her "in a way that every young girl wants to be looked at, at sometime"
#LeonardoDiCaprio #sigh :)

Am I the only one whose definition of a holiday is sleep as much as you want?
Seems like so!

Ambersariya
#punjabi #music #iLove :)

Magicians
The life of one
What must that be like?
When you're far away from family at the expense of purely entertaining strangers and proving yourself on a daily basis by performing amongst a crowd with different faces everyday!
#Majority #StillInPieces

Dominos
Priority is obviously given to the customer sitting at home who may have placed the order at the exact same time as the customer standing right there at the outlet
Of course, commercial point of view
Guarantee of promised delivery time
But, what about your goodwill that went into the dustbin in the head of the customer standing right infront of you?
Yeah, yeah, there's monopoly in cheeseburst and more
But, big picture?
#TooManyThoughts
[When I'm unable to snap out of observing the working style around in general!]

A brand is not a brand if more than three auto guys don't know the location of its only building in the area.
Is it?

There is definitely no one like Mike Horn.
Words may not suffice my description of him
But maybe a post someday, only about him
The man has done things no one has, with unfailing faith and determination
Truly inspiring in the real sense of it
Someone who's passion for life is a definition of his own
        But a question that I never got to ask him...
How can he possibly keep at it ALL the time being humane?
Everyone has ups and downs in life.. The extreme high and low moments when you give up at a point without another thought
        My question isn't how he hasn't/didn't give up
My question is, how has it really been possible to keep at it? What were the things he managed to remind himself of, that kept him going incessantly?
#Mystery #RealPeople #MeaningOfLife

Government and its bans and preposterous laws.

When you think it can't get any worse, it can!

"Economic reforms have slacked. Educational reforms yet to begin. Sexual reforms are a distant dream when lingerie on mannequins is banned."

The incomprehensible chaos in Turkey!
What is happening in Istanbul?

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Bombay Rains :)

#Traffic #CabRides #WorkLife #Khichdi

Ilahi
Kabira
Dilli Wali Girlfriend
Balam Pichkari
Ghagra
#GoodBollywoodMusicAfterSoLong

" I fail to understand the 'good' part of 'good morning' "

"Is life so serious that others really determine your destiny?"
"The rules of morality are not the conclusion of our reason."
"The more you let yourself go, the less others let you go."

"An honest, uncensored expression is as rare as the person capable of producing it."
"I am a Capricorn, because when I love, I love hard."
"Forever is composed of nows."

An Honest Mistake - The Bravery

Apollo (Radio Edit) - Hardwell
Beating Of My Heart - M-3ox (Matisse & Sadko Remix)
#TomorrowlandMusic

"How news works in India.
Incident. News report. National outrage. Media frenzy. International coverage. Hurt national pride. Denial. #rape"

"One does not only wish to be understood when one writes;
one wishes just as surely not to be understood."

Faith.. is it?

I don't know what it is
If it's people's words that affect your opinion and decisions
Or the lyrics of a song
Or a similar situation handled earlier
Or something you happened to witness and could relate to it

Why? Why does it all have to be so hard?
"It eats me up alive" - does that sentence even make sense when whatever it is/was, has already managed to get out of your system?

I miss
so much
of the past
that I don't know how to go about it now

I miss
the comfort
the hatred

A part of me wants some of it so badly
The other part just doesn't wanna be the risk taker any longer

I hate how things become when we grow up
Why do we?

I know, I know.. it's the problems we've created in our heads
Problems that don't even exist really
BUT
In our heads, they do naa

I'm just not ready to deal with something again, something I've already dealt with, in the past
But if it is the power of the mind that has everything in its control, then why the thoughts that you do not want to keep in/around your head, keep coming back?
I'm not saying you're fighting it any longer
No, you're not, you dealt with it, and it did come to peace and calm
But it's like medical surge
It seemed all flowers and rainbows for a bit until you're falling back into something you've just managed to get out from

When you lose things
Like the lines you'd penned down in a note on your phone and it just vanished.
Yeah, yeah, that happens
But, it was a long one, and you'd really elaborated on some of your thoughts, you did think you'd get back to

When the universe is still conspiring and you don't let it get it to you
It affects you a little, each time there's a knock at the door you shut a while ago, invariably anyway

There should be more than one Sunday in a week!
Period.

A person told me sometime back,
for a child, love will always be conditional
There are conditions attached to that love towards the parent
But for a parent,
love will always be unconditional towards any of their children
#True

Paint The Silence - South
Honey And The Moon - Joseph Arthur
Hide And Seek - Imogen Heap
Hallelujah - Jeff Buckley
Terrible Person - Rooney
I Want To Hear What You Have Got To Say - The Subways
Blue Light - Bloc Party
Soul Meets Body - Death Cab for Cutie
Song For No One - Ian Broudie
#Music

"A person who has never owned a dog has missed a wonderful part of life."
"Some people don't realize what they've got because everything was given to them."

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"Now, should we treat women as independent agents, responsible for themselves? Ofcourse.
But being responsible has nothing to do with being raped. Women don't get raped because they were drinking or took drugs. Women do not get raped because they weren't careful enough.
Women get raped because someone raped them."

#TheEndlessRapeCases
Delhi = The Rape Capital

<The truth>

Where is the humanity?
Seriously, where the hell is it?

<Crisis in our community>





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Sometimes, words fail

When you're on a road that wasn't the one you had in mind for the journey, but you took it anyway
You're also in a position to kinda predict the latter half of the road considering you're half way through it already...
But you're still in no position to say shit about the destination
So obviously, that leaves me with, "What for?!"

One can only keep at all of it for a certain period of time
It doesn't become about giving up or priorities after that. It only makes you question yourself once again for the reason of having held on to something for this long to begin with!

Another scenario is when people make it harder, when they can't stop being someone they're not or can't stop rubbing things in your face for no apparent reason at all

One thought that'll probably never stop crossing my mind:
Doesn't it take more effort and thought to be someone else? Someone you're not? Fake? Does it not?
I fail to understand. Each time I try to, I fail to understand how it's easier to be someone you're not infront of the world. So much of the show. Energy. BLAH.

Selfishness
How can you have so much of it? How?
You wouldn't care about the people around you out of whom at least one matters? And the others matter to that one!? You wouldn't care...
What I wonder is, if one has always been like this or something in your life got you to become who you are today
When you aren't in a position to question this person.. Or you wouldn't because you probably can't put it across well.. But, wow
That amount of selfishness
The world is so different than what it seems to be after all
It all is
The people you knew may become the people you know again
And ofcourse we all have the people who we once knew

When you wanted to have cooked wai-wai, but because you are the laziest person you know..
you end up with baked lays plus pizza topping!
#OneEvening #TrueStory

City Of Dreams - Alesso & Dirty South
Forever - Matt Hires
Another Life - No
Last Kiss - Pearl Jam
Call Me A Spaceman - Hardwell
Everytime We Touch - Cascada
Reload - Sebastian Ingrosso & Tommy Trash
Resurrection - Axwell's Recut Club Version
50 Ways To Say Goodbye - Train
#Music

So sick of explaining
Don't have it in me any more
to answer questions that have made you question the friendship you kept for this long to begin with

"There are times in our lives when love really does conquer all: exhaustion, sleep deprivation, anything.
And then there are those times when it seems like love brings us nothing but pain."
"We're always looking for ways to ease the pain. Sometimes we ease the pain by making the best of what we have. Sometimes is by losing ourselves in the moment. And sometimes, all we need to do to ease the pain is call a simple truce."

I love metaphors :)

"Remember when things were easy?
Me neither."
"Change is good as long as I don't have to do anything different."
"Finding a way to live the simple life today is man's most complicated task."
"When you are observing a fact completely, with all your energy, the fact changes."
"You should get some sleep. You look like crap."

On the edge

So, I met someone for the first time a couple of days back, right before I was leaving that place. And the first question this person asked me was, "What's your name?" I replied, "Garima." I just wasn't prepared for a second question that came even before I took my next breath and she asked, "Which caste?"
I did reply to her within a second or two, and then I surely left as I was supposed to.
I just couldn't get myself to reason out the validity of that question. I mean how exactly did that help define me better to you at all? Like seriously.

When you reach that point that it's not funny any more, there is lack of amazement from you, for the simple reason that there is no reasoning and logic around you at all
You wouldn't want to start off from where you left. Not because it doesn't feel right, but because it doesn't feel the need to any more
I'm actually surprised that I am surprised with any of it. I should've seen it coming.

Sensitivity is one of the worst things ever
When your state of mind is all good and you couldn't be bothered about all the whatever things on earth, but oh no, wait, that can't stay the same. See, things have to get to you/you let them get to you, for the simple reason that you understand and value the importance of what comes in rarity.
Things messed up in another's head around, will hunt you down and mess it all up in your head too.

When you have more in you to take than you thought you did.
I miss home. So much. It's not even funny.
Done with living the supposedly independent life.
It's been too long now...

Travelling in Mumbai.
Aren't those three words enough for one to start with an essay?
#IMeanIt

Fickle mindedness - I don't get it
What were you originally thinking really?
When you can see it's messed up for one around, but you really do feel kinda handicapped in the situation when it's brought forth to you with all that it's got to it.

The local trains, the autos, the rush at peak hours, the adrenaline in people!
#OnlyHappensInBombay

Nothing like Grey's Anatomy :)

Awkward moments about not being to explain to someone about how you've always valued one of the things meant to be valued, and you give up on explaining because you didn't feel the need to, when you were just about one fourth way through it! Ha.

A girl who had to take an AC Bus to Borivali got dropped off by her father at Thane..
And she thought over the same thing that she does everyday
Will I make it in that overcrowded bus once again?
After she took a deep breath and got off the car, she said bye in the local language to her father, and the expression on his face also had something to it.
Life's got too many things to it and we make decisions everyday. Just that some that are regularly taken by us become something else in our heads, but they are the ones that decide the course of the day really.
#OneIncident #Mumbai

Don't You Give Up On Me - Milo Greene
Dazed And Confused - Iko
Sweet Disposition - Temper Trap
#Music

'This is a place where horrible things happen. You were right to go. You're probably escaping disaster. Look at me. I practically grew up here, and you're right, it hurt me in ways I'll probably never get over. I have a lot of memories of people. People I've lost forever. But I have a lot of other memories too. This is the place I fell in love. The place where I found my friends. This is where I learned to be who I am. Where I learned how to take responsibility for someone else's life. And it's the place where I met you. So I figure this place has given me as much as it's taken away from me. I've lived here as much as I've survived here. It just depends on how I look at it. I'm gonna choose to look at it that way, and remember you that way. Hope you're good. Bye.'
 - The above paragraph is a monologue from a series, with some words changed in it.

Some people will always remain the discouraging ones. You should just never give up on not letting their words get to you.
Grrr.

"Closures do not come cheap."
"When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice."
"Knowledge which is acquired under compulsion obtains no hold on the mind."
"I'm still writing about you and you haven't read a word."
"Sometimes you wish people would just see themselves the way you do."

Crisp much?

So,
When your day has turned out to be nowhere close to what you'd thought it'd be like
But of course, when has the picture in the head actually turned out to be the same?

When it's all so uncertain around you, that at one point, you feel handicapped and don't know what to do, think or feel about it all

And then to top it all, your phone has no signal all of a sudden for no explicable reason
Like it just doesn't have network and you try for a bit, but you give up too fast, even if it's just about your phone
That's because the day feels long but also flew
And then you end up telling yourself,
Sometimes, things aren't supposed to happen after all!
I don't know if too many things happen to surprise me lately.. But they sure amuse me.

Dear Delhi,
Learn something from Mumbai. Something.
Sincerely,
The city that never sleeps.

It feels nice when certain people/strangers figure out things about you faster than people who've known you, did!

Are you supposed to stop living because it's not safe around?
- the obvious question of the hour

When everyone's life seems like a ride
One has to, just has to spend time in this city to believe what it's like here!
#BombayLocalTrainStations

And why would you do something for the world again? I mean, especially when you say that you're doing it for yourself and that you want to, but you forget where you started off with that chain of thought. Didn't you?
When we forget the basis of what it is that's got us where we are.
To remind ourselves of the basis is imperative.

To Build A Home - The Cinematic Orchestra
Addicted - Morgan Page ft. Greg Laswell
New York - Snow Patrol
Where Do I Even Start - Morgan Taylor Reid
She Went Quietly - Charlie Winston
Atlas Hands - Benjamin Francis Leftwich
Lose Control - Ted N Ted
Anything But You - Civalias
#ILoveMusic

"It's one of those things people say: you can't move on until you've let go of the past. Letting go is the easy part. It's the moving on that's painful. So sometimes we fight it, trying to keep things the same. Things can't stay the same though. At some point you just have to let go, move on. Because no matter how painful it is, it's the only way we grow."

Just sad?

Disgusted. At our generation's perverted thought process. Whatever happened to genuineness in this world?!
#It'sJustSad.

Where is chivalry dead and why does it seem to get replaced by chauvinism?
Where are all the nice guys in the world? Or it really is a myth that there are some who exist?
#Sucks.

The theory of all men being the same is probably right.

Sometimes, our instinct can be wrong. About a thing/situation/person.
It doesn't have to be like we're picturing it. It's obviously like the sea. The more you step into it, the deeper you go, you find out, it's not all that different. Or I should probably remove the words, 'all that' also from there. Because it's not something unusually different at all and it falls in the same category like the rest existing in the world.

If I believe, I always mean everything I say and make it clear when I don't.. I guess not even a fraction of this world likes to believe that there might actually be people saying things they mean and not just for a conversation to take place or to please the other or, whatever.

There's more I have in mind regarding that bit. But it's all in pieces.

Joseph Morgan - A fine actor! :)
#BritishAccentIsSomethingILove

And,
"Without music, life would be a mistake."
"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song."

One after another, because there's always a first time :)

The time to leave the city is close.

So close that it's been two years since I started this already.

Yes, a lot has changed since then.

The name of my blog is all about Mumbai and that is sorta self explanatory.

The thought leaves me blank...

http://garimanagpal.blogspot.in/2011/09/just-mumbai.html

When you have to tell yourself to calm down and not do a word vomit because of however people behave around you

When happiness could be just the availability of a plug point close to your bed. I’m not even saying a plug point right next to the bed. Close would do when all you have is one in the whole room which is located centrally at the area for which you’d have to move your ass, yeah.

Charlie Brown – Coldplay

Avicii – Penguin Club Mix

Sweet Disposition – Temper Trap

When you have to set the music volume to the highest so the words coming out of someone else’s mouth don’t get onto your last nerve

When font contributes as a factor in wanting to read a particular article/whatever.

"I'd said it before and meant it : Alive or undead, the love of my life was a badass."

Haha.

Another time

When things happen and you find out the reasons fast,
it just becomes easier to acknowledge and take it all and go on with it
When you find out the reasons later, it's only harder

Wind + solitary walks + your favourite songs = :)

But I can't wait for the next chapter of my life to begin. It's like when you know you'll miss what you have with you right now, but you want to turn the page of the book nevertheless. But then again, who says you can?
It's another thing to talk metaphorically and make a comparison to the pages of a book, but at the end, it's life.

When it's not your place to say,
this is what one could, "I'm happy, you're happy"
*an emoticon that's close to a smile*

I always find my heart full of a certain satisfying emotion when I see the kid on the road eating a chocolate given by me, when he/she came and asked for money.
And because I know how rarely that happens, it's an all the more reminder in the face, that says,
'Is se tumhare mann ki gareebi zaroor kam ho jayegi, lekin desh ki nahi'

#TheBoyWhoTurnedAroundAndLookedAtMeWhenHeOpenedTheChocolate
One time, when I was travelling in the local train and it moved slower than it could!
A boy who wore nothing on his torso, and came cleaning the train, asking for anything to the passengers. And when I searched my bag for a five rupee dairy milk given to me by a friend earlier in the day, and instead I found a ten rupee kit kat bought by me only.
He went a little ahead and opened it with his mouth and looked at me. And I just felt happy.
He went to a corner and ate it up then. And the next minute, he was back to asking for anything, ahead.

Love's To Blame - Joel & Luke
Ocean Wide - The Afters
Brave - Tawgs Salter
In My Veins - Andrew Belle
In The End - Snow Patrol
Love Song - Sara Bareilles

"Whatever happened to chivalry? Does it only exist in 80's movies? I want John Cusack holding a boombox outside my window. I wanna ride off on a lawnmower with Patrick Dempsey. I want Jake from Sixteen Candles waiting outside the church for me. I want Judd Nelson thrusting his fist into the air because he knows he got me. Just once I want my life to be like an 80's movie, preferably one with a really awesome musical number for no apparent reason. But no, no, John Hughes did not direct my life."

"Just because they disagree, doesn't mean you ain't right."

I don't understand how people around behave like all's good in the world sometimes.

Like alright, I get it. Positivity n all. But there's a difference between just being indifferent towards things around you and actually being in a situation when you can't do anything about it.

"Nothing goes as planned.

Everything will break.

People say goodbye.

In their own special way.

All that you rely on

And all that you can fake

Will leave you in the morning

But find you in the day.."

Doodle or not?

The times when you don't know what you're doing, but you do it anyway.
And, you don't know why, but you do it still.
And I don't have an answer.

Astronomia (Electro Edit) - Tony Igy
Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall - Coldplay

Midnight snacks don't always have a positive effect on the stomach the next morning :|

Randomness.

Excitement because of good music.

Sick of subjects like Accounts.

When you care so much and you'd do anything, and I mean it, anything, to make another human happy ~

Partially, it does feel like your objective of existing is found in the form of another person's happiness, but partially, it feels like it's all in vain and it really, really doesn't matter because it is not necessary that this person understands/wants to understand how much you actually care and how far you could go to prove that.

The feel of Listerine in your mouth at night :D

When phones act weird and love to hang.

The feeling of meeting an old school friend out of the blue at an unexpected place and time, and the good feeling sinking in after a while, even though this person might have never been a good friend as such, but an old school friend nevertheless :)

I never thought I'd like trance music but surprisingly, I do. Atleast the one I mentioned above :)

The quote by John Lennon I love,

"When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down 'happy'. They told me I didn't understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life."

Oh and,

Letting go isn't a one time thing. It is something you do everyday, over and over again.

~ Really?

Just because.

Winters & Mumbai :)

Between - Courrier

A Drop In The Ocean - Ron Pope

Give Me Strength - Snow Patrol

Holding On And Letting Go - Ross Copperman

Drive By - Train

Before The Worst - The Script 

"I'm unusually hard to hold on to

Blank stares at blank pages
No easy way to say this
You mean well, but you make this hard on me
I'm not gonna write you a love song
'cause you asked for it..."

The difference in the feeling and interpretation of music and its lyrics, when you hear it out loud in a car and when you listen to the same song through your earphones.

When people/strangers have uncanny resemblance with someone you know.

The good feeling and the bad feeling

And then there's the random instinct feeling and it comes true for someone else but not for yourself.

I can't begin to imagine leaving Mumbai. Just can't :(

The importance of earphones, in general!

"It's everything you wanted, it's everything you don't

It's one door swinging open and one door swinging closed
Some prayers find an answer
Some prayers never know
We're holding on and letting go"

The times when a Sunday morning begins with a low feeling overall

When you don't like the fact that one's words could get your tears out that fast!

When your running nose causes an almost headache and apart from the fact that you're gonna be on your bed the whole day eating and not doing anything substantial as such, it doesn't feel like a Sunday with that sinking feeling

The times when you don't wanna exist. And just not be alive. Temporarily.

And when the world wants to talk to you when you're in no mood to and is busy when you want to.

One for now,

"The thing about addiction is, it never ends well. Because eventually, whatever it was that was getting us high, stops feeling good, and starts to hurt. Still, they say you don't kick the habit until you've hit rock bottom.

But how do you know when you're there? Because no matter how badly a thing is hurting us...
...sometimes letting it go hurts even more."

The concept of marriage - still trying to comprehend that bit.

Things seem changed when one's way of looking at it changes! It doesn't always mean that they have.

The movie, Made of Honour, always makes me happy :)

A corner of my mind : part 4

And when people form judgments, and the feeling of 'whatever' comes in your head.

They want to judge, I let them. I don't want to stand in their way. If it makes a difference to me, I'll do something to change their opinion, if not, live with it.

I had been looking for a song called, 'Torch Song' by Shady Bard since a while now, but never really found the right link to download it for some reason, considering it's not a new song! And today, when I remembered that I haven't found it still, I happened to search for it randomly and ...

I found it :D

It's like when you expect the least because you're so sick of trying, and then you get it, the feeling is different all together. Even if what I'm talking about here, is a song! But, :)

"What a time to pick a fight

The world is full of those tonight

I looked at you

You stole my life

but here it is the simple task

Save me..." 

When you're told stuff you never expected, from persons you never expected it from, or you found what you'd probably been looking for since some time now... That's the feeling I'm talking about.

:)

And,

A landlady and a maid who can't stop whining!

Ufff! Matlab, bas karo yaar! And I thought I could never reach a point of being able to let go of things, but my God, there are times like these when I realize, that there are so many people out there who take longer than I did!

People should never ever gift me chocolate!

I mean, one, you will end up eating it all by yourself because it was a gift and when you know, you stay with someone who's not very fond of chocolate as such.

And, two, it makes you fat to the extent that even if you don't mind it, someone else whose words you'd mind will come up to you and say, hello! You should mind it!

Haha.

And when I think of how well words can be put across someone, the quote that comes to my mind is,

"No amount of time with you will ever be enough but,

we'll start with forever."

And a random one that I read sometime back,

"It's like you're screaming but no one can hear. You almost feel ashamed that someone could be that important, that without them, you feel like nothing. No one will ever understand how much it hurts. You feel hopeless, like nothing can save you. And when it's over and it's gone, you almost wish that you could have all that bad stuff back so you can have the good."

Love.. Know if you're stepping or falling in it!

Birds chirping in the afternoon in the typical morning tone and I'm not kidding?

Or is that nothing unusual?

Only four more months in Mumbai :(

New people/friends towards the ending of a chapter of life. But it's always nice to meet opinionated people :)

Music videos that change your opinion on the lyrics of a song?

And just when you start to believe that you have a much clearer picture of how life's gonna go and you start to look forward to what's ahead, somebody has to mess with your head! And, literally, a somebody. And, my brain goes like, why? And who gave you the right to approach someone who matters to me and mess with his/her head in the first place?

Loud music comes to my rescue when I'm frustrated. And maybe, Word Mole? I figured the word mole game bit today though!

And, some quotes that I came across randomly, 

"At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, it's usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to remain close to, and once we've chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them. The people that are still with you at the end of the day, those are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need."

Question to self : What would make a person stick around even though he/she is greatly hurt?

"The point is we can't help who we fall in love with"

"Even now, I believe that for the most part, love is about choices. It's about putting down the poison and the dagger and making your own happy ending...most of the time. And sometimes, despite all your best intentions, fate wins anyway."

"You know as well as I do it's not about what you look like, or your job, or how successful you are. It's about having people in your life that you love and who love you...that's all that matters." 


"And the things I remember best - those are the things I wasn't supposed to do and I did them anyway. The thing is, life is too damn short to be following these rules."
~ Grey's Anatomy

Words poured

When first impressions are so pathetic.
I'm not talking about the saying, "First impressions are not always the best." But one that clears the fact that I don't even want to look at this person with another perspective or probably hear his/her side of the story. That's not me, but I didn't know there could be people who could convince me about not wanting to get to know them further at all, to this extent.

Chocolate and Music. How does one manage to blend things together to that extent and come up with something that soothes the human mind on another level?
Yes, the ingredients are simple but it's the quantity and an individual's recipe of it all that matters, ofcourse.

And sometimes, you care, maybe the least, but you do.

And you have no idea why.

And I hate packing. But I hate unpacking more. I have to pack still! The feeling of going home is simply :)

Pictures are very important to take. One can interpret that as a photograph or a painting, as I have come across people who like to make it all by themselves instead of capturing the moment by just a click :)
Not all of us choose the easiest way to create a memory that way. Because perhaps there aren't many ways to create memories after all or maybe there are too many on the contrary. But they are an essential record of a flashback of what life would look like in a tangible form. And, therefore, they are very important to be created :)

When people you barely know and don't give a crap about, somehow manage to ruin your mood - Eh?
How exactly does that happen?

I also feel, that the feeling of watching a tv show on television is very different from watching the exact same tv show on your laptop. It's like, when you know it's on your laptop, you know you can pause it, change it and not watch that particular episode, go back to the gas stove as and when you want to check if what you're making is ready and then get back to it, see the part you love over and over again, not see the part you don't like or for that matter, stop it all.
It's like it doesn't feel all that real anymore. It's like reading the pages of a book on an electronic notebook and not flipping every page of a real one which gives the feel of reading. The feeling of bookmarking a page with the bookmark you picked up from a shop and smelling the book maybe? Even though I don't read books, I guess that's what it'd feel like.
It's like being able to control life all together to the extent that you can stop it, pause it, not know it, re-live the parts you like again, and maybe not do anything about it at all at some point too.
And when you know you're watching it on television, you know there's gonna be a break and that you can probably only get back to your gas stove in that limited defined time, you can't fast forward and, you cannot go back so you might as well listen to the dialogues carefully knowing they won't be repeated.
It's a different thing when you know you have the internet and everything is available to you if you want to get back to something you missed out on when it comes to things like these.
But, you can't go back and know more or for that matter, change things done in life, in the moment. It maybe something you said, something you should have said and you didn't.

And when does the grass not seem greener on the other side? Seriously.

Soothing tune + Right lyrics = Good music?

I Was Wrong ~ Sleeperstar
Echo ~ Jason Walker
Family Tree ~ Matthew West
Turn To Stone ~ Ingrid Michaelson
Stay ~ Hurts
It Is What It Is ~ Lifehouse
I Should Go ~ Levi Kreis
Bloodstream ~ Stateless
Losing Your Memory ~ Ryan Star
Holding a Heart ~ Girl Named Toby
Here We Go ~ Mat Kearney
Only One ~ Alex Band
Say (All I Need) ~ One Republic
Longest Night ~ Howie Day
Come Back When You Can ~ Barcelona
Skinny Love ~ Birdy

Yes, those are the ones echoing in my head these days.
Taken from The Vampire Diaries, yes.
I recall the scene in my head, with a few of them.

When you're half way through your journey, it seems like you'll make it in time to the destination as per planned, but you don't know what's in, in the last bit of the journey yet!

Aah, and as I learn and progress in the area of being able to let go, I was also reminded that it is better to be surprised than to be disappointed, so expect the least? And how many times have we all heard that before? Uh yeah, it's not easy, but try harder every time you do.

"I saw you fell asleep
While you were reading
The pages on your face
You had been weeping
and I saw..."

A cop moving his hand constantly at a junction where the traffic signal is nowhere close = Usage of excess energy? Or he believed that by that movement the vehicles moved faster? #Blah

Chocolate - makes you happy and makes you wanna forget things?

When you're so caught up in your head with innumerable thoughts, you just wanna shut your eyes and not exist for a moment.

# Thunder and lightning and a pour after days of unbearable heat
~ Yes, the unpredictable weather of Mumbai drops my jaw sometimes!

When you realize you have to sit down and figure out your career plan.
# Uncertainty. In denial of things.

Ian Somerhalder. A breathtakingly amazing actor. And, I don't think I'd ever have enough of him.
Partially in love with his character, Damon Salvatore and partially with him :)

"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
"The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom."
"We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be."
"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect."
"I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you."
"We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect."

Punjabi mood?

Everyone's definition of friendship is different. It was never the way I thought it was.
You care - good. You don't care - good. You care and you show it - good.
You care and you don't care to show it - eh?

Expectation always hurts. Always. So try harder than you have been trying not to expect.

When the internet behaves properly but the websites don't?

I always enjoy being in a punjabi mood :)

Blackberry - Big, big distraction for anything.

It's just difficult to take things in sometimes. Harder than you thought it would be and way easier when you expected it to be hard.

I can be very feminist sometimes. And yes, if I were God, I would make sure that every man is a woman for atleast one day of their lives and experience all that a woman goes through. It's another thing to understand what one goes through and sort of imagine what it's like to be in that place and it's another thing to actually be there.

If you've always believed that there is someone you know, who you belong with, irrespective of this person being with you or for that matter even being a part of your life, if he/she is meant to be there with you, he/she will find a way to be. If not, it was never meant to be the way you believed it would be. Really? And I thought our actions make our destiny, little did I know it was fate that does. But then again, really?

P.S.- You never really know.

Yes, a post script in the middle. Deal with it.

Before making an effort of trying to know others, know yourself well. Atleast know yourself to the extent that you know what cheers you up.

FOOD ~ Gol gappas. Cheeseburst. Uncle Chips. Homemade chocolate cake. Ghar ki Dal Roti. Chilli chicken. Maggi. Cheese popcorn. Dairy Milk Silk. Top Ramen Curry. Chocoholic from Theobroma (Mumbai). Any ice cream in your fridge.
Now that's good stuff :)

Music usually helps in any situation. But not really always anymore.

And something that I've said much earlier as well,
Life - It's not always about the destination, but about the journey instead.

"Madame, all stories, if continued far enough, end in death, and he is no true story teller who would keep that from you." - Ernest Hemingway.

Out of a title again?

When you know you're gonna die.
When you know you're gonna be killed for something you're gonna do.
But you do it. Not for yourself, but for the others you care for, so their lives don't end up as miserable as yours did.
They can live in peace, breathe in peace, and don't have to do that basic thing, literally with somebody else's permission around.

Bol. Another movie with a message well conveyed.
But the only sad part being that it'll remain a movie with a message amongst a class of society of which a major part is not applicable for. It will never reach that part where the message is really meant to reach. Although, with positive thinking, one amongst the hundred in a theater might make the message reach where it's required.

Heart Vacancy by The Wanted - pleasant :)

Too much food is not good on a Sunday.

"Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs."

Sunday - the day of the week which is suppose to be for not doing anything. Not projects!
And that too, handwritten!

Some songs that make you believe that you will smile while crying :)
But sometimes, it isn't so.

Poetry :)

Made of Honour - I love!

Chalking out the whole plan for the rest of your life - not so good.
Not being too planned - good?

"They do not love that do not show their love." - Shakespeare.
True or untrue?

Just Mumbai

~Mumbai
a city~
that never sleeps!
Where traffic signals are followed at 7 am!
Where there really is traffic, at 7:30 am
Where rides in local buses aren't always like what you thought they'd be like
Where not travelling in local trains ever, will always leave your visit incomplete
Where strawberries in cream taste different altogether
Where there'll always be a positive vibe even when you're surrounded by all the possible negative ones
Where the wind makes you wanna believe in yourself
Where rains can have a direct or inverse relationship with your thought process
Where people are friendly
Where secrets are kept and, kept
Where the feeling of wanting to write, just comes
Where I started THIS
Where memories are built in the least time available
Where the feeling is just right
Where you admit that you know what you do
Where a journey starts and will end
Where solitude can be bliss
Where walks don't get you tired
Where simplicity drives you
Where darkness doesn't scare as much as it could
Where getting out in pyjamas doesn't feel even remotely odd
Where you want to be just yourself, all the more
Where desserts like chocoholic exist
Where being out alone at an odd hour isn't as scary as it should be
Where people make sure you call gol gappas, pani puri..!
Where love has more than one definition
A city one can never forget :)

That was SO random.
I know I have to leave Mumbai very soon.
I guess that's why all of that just came pouring.
It will be very, very hard for me to leave this city.

And, just another thing,
Letting go isn't easy but that's the only choice we have left sometimes? - very individualistic again.

I love Mumbai :)

Nonsensical?

Sometimes you're in a place for a reason, where you know you're not needed at all, but you're there.

You can't wait to get out of it but you stay because it gives somebody else the assurance that you're right there.

You're tired, you woke up early, you want to get home and there is more you can do..

But you're there for a friend. Not out of having no option but out of choice to a great extent. The friend has been there with you too when he/she wasn't getting anything by being there for you. But he/she did stay without a second thought that probably crossed your mind but never crossed his/hers :)

Tagline for Amul butter on Independence Day,

Happy Anna-dependence Day!

Amul ~ The Lokpriya Butter.

Interesting how ideas are developed in one's thoughts and how they go on to become something.

'While the whole country awaits a revolution, the only thing left for Mamta Banarjee to do, is to rename West Bengal, as Paschim Banga. Killing it.'

I mean, seriously?

Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara :)

Current obsessions : Late Goodbye by Poets Of The Fall and Good Riddance by Greenday.

Mumbai weather - Killing it! :)

I like the idea of candid photographs.

Leaving Mumbai is gonna be very hard for me :(

"I let it fall, my heart, and as it fell, you rose to claim it"

There is no time for cereal :)

Economics becomes interesting when the person explaining it to you explains it in a manner you thought you'd like.

Accounts always leaves me with a straight face.

The song/advertisement, 'Har Ek Friend Zaroori Hota Hai' by Airtel :)

Have I mentioned this quote before? ~ "Forgetfulness is a form of freedom."

It really is.

"Half the night I waste in sighs

In a wakeful dose I sorrow

For the hand, the lips, the eyes 

For the meeting of the morrow..." ~ Alfred Tennyson.

'Maybe people don't forget about you, but they forget to remember you.
People don't mean to forget.'
Really?

Some expressions that the Hindi language can convey cannot be conveyed by English. And, really.

Everything that started off badly doesn't necessarily end badly :)