Sunday, January 27, 2013

On the edge

So, I met someone for the first time a couple of days back, right before I was leaving that place. And the first question this person asked me was, "What's your name?" I replied, "Garima." I just wasn't prepared for a second question that came even before I took my next breath and she asked, "Which caste?"
I did reply to her within a second or two, and then I surely left as I was supposed to.
I just couldn't get myself to reason out the validity of that question. I mean how exactly did that help define me better to you at all? Like seriously.

When you reach that point that it's not funny any more, there is lack of amazement from you, for the simple reason that there is no reasoning and logic around you at all
You wouldn't want to start off from where you left. Not because it doesn't feel right, but because it doesn't feel the need to any more
I'm actually surprised that I am surprised with any of it. I should've seen it coming.

Sensitivity is one of the worst things ever
When your state of mind is all good and you couldn't be bothered about all the whatever things on earth, but oh no, wait, that can't stay the same. See, things have to get to you/you let them get to you, for the simple reason that you understand and value the importance of what comes in rarity.
Things messed up in another's head around, will hunt you down and mess it all up in your head too.

When you have more in you to take than you thought you did.
I miss home. So much. It's not even funny.
Done with living the supposedly independent life.
It's been too long now...

Travelling in Mumbai.
Aren't those three words enough for one to start with an essay?

Fickle mindedness - I don't get it
What were you originally thinking really?
When you can see it's messed up for one around, but you really do feel kinda handicapped in the situation when it's brought forth to you with all that it's got to it.

The local trains, the autos, the rush at peak hours, the adrenaline in people!

Nothing like Grey's Anatomy :)

Awkward moments about not being to explain to someone about how you've always valued one of the things meant to be valued, and you give up on explaining because you didn't feel the need to, when you were just about one fourth way through it! Ha.

A girl who had to take an AC Bus to Borivali got dropped off by her father at Thane..
And she thought over the same thing that she does everyday
Will I make it in that overcrowded bus once again?
After she took a deep breath and got off the car, she said bye in the local language to her father, and the expression on his face also had something to it.
Life's got too many things to it and we make decisions everyday. Just that some that are regularly taken by us become something else in our heads, but they are the ones that decide the course of the day really.
#OneIncident #Mumbai

Don't You Give Up On Me - Milo Greene
Dazed And Confused - Iko
Sweet Disposition - Temper Trap

'This is a place where horrible things happen. You were right to go. You're probably escaping disaster. Look at me. I practically grew up here, and you're right, it hurt me in ways I'll probably never get over. I have a lot of memories of people. People I've lost forever. But I have a lot of other memories too. This is the place I fell in love. The place where I found my friends. This is where I learned to be who I am. Where I learned how to take responsibility for someone else's life. And it's the place where I met you. So I figure this place has given me as much as it's taken away from me. I've lived here as much as I've survived here. It just depends on how I look at it. I'm gonna choose to look at it that way, and remember you that way. Hope you're good. Bye.'
 - The above paragraph is a monologue from a series, with some words changed in it.

Some people will always remain the discouraging ones. You should just never give up on not letting their words get to you.

"Closures do not come cheap."
"When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice."
"Knowledge which is acquired under compulsion obtains no hold on the mind."
"I'm still writing about you and you haven't read a word."
"Sometimes you wish people would just see themselves the way you do."

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Crisp much?

When your day has turned out to be nowhere close to what you'd thought it'd be like
But of course, when has the picture in the head actually turned out to be the same?

When it's all so uncertain around you, that at one point, you feel handicapped and don't know what to do, think or feel about it all

And then to top it all, your phone has no signal all of a sudden for no explicable reason
Like it just doesn't have network and you try for a bit, but you give up too fast, even if it's just about your phone
That's because the day feels long but also flew
And then you end up telling yourself,
Sometimes, things aren't supposed to happen after all!
I don't know if too many things happen to surprise me lately.. But they sure amuse me.

Dear Delhi,
Learn something from Mumbai. Something.
The city that never sleeps.

It feels nice when certain people/strangers figure out things about you faster than people who've known you, did!

Are you supposed to stop living because it's not safe around?
- the obvious question of the hour

When everyone's life seems like a ride
One has to, just has to spend time in this city to believe what it's like here!

And why would you do something for the world again? I mean, especially when you say that you're doing it for yourself and that you want to, but you forget where you started off with that chain of thought. Didn't you?
When we forget the basis of what it is that's got us where we are.
To remind ourselves of the basis is imperative.

To Build A Home - The Cinematic Orchestra
Addicted - Morgan Page ft. Greg Laswell
New York - Snow Patrol
Where Do I Even Start - Morgan Taylor Reid
She Went Quietly - Charlie Winston
Atlas Hands - Benjamin Francis Leftwich
Lose Control - Ted N Ted
Anything But You - Civalias

"It's one of those things people say: you can't move on until you've let go of the past. Letting go is the easy part. It's the moving on that's painful. So sometimes we fight it, trying to keep things the same. Things can't stay the same though. At some point you just have to let go, move on. Because no matter how painful it is, it's the only way we grow."

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

New year doesn't feel new yet

"We're all looking for answers
In career, in life, in everything
Sometimes the answers we're looking for have been hiding just beneath the surface
Other times, we find answers when we didn't even realize we were asking the question
Sometimes the answers can catch us completely by surprise
And sometimes, even when we find the answers we've been looking for, we are still left with a whole hell of a lot of questions."
(one word's been changed from the above quote, but yeah)

It reaches another level of hilarity when I see the kind of problems that one pinpoints and makes a mountain of, even with all that one could possibly ask for
How one can be so indifferent to the things happening around in your own country.. But at the same time, you make such a big deal about it when it comes to you knowing of what's happening. So, obviously, empathy has no trace here at all.

When you present well, but you're so filthy backstage, that it depresses me as to how messy you could be overall and never ever do anything about that part at all. And may I add, once the show's started and is over, there is obviously no looking back at what the clean up is like/should be, because, duh, you wouldn't be the one doing it after all. The dirty work is left by you for someone inferior to you to do. And it never made sense to you to take a peep into what that's like/step in that person's shoe, because oh, you've never exactly had to do that in life before. I wouldn't say, the person is lucky here, but it's unfortunate that even when you pretend you see so much around, you don't absorb any of it, you adsorb it.

When you say things on another person's behalf when you can't/won't do shit. It makes a part of me die, because I know that the person who'd be doing it all at the end would never be taking the credit for it, but gets tired, and works like there won't be another chance to make the best of your talent, or perhaps, the person/guest happy again. It makes me feel sorry for one who makes the promises and is all talk, but you would still go on about it because you know that eventually, someone will do the main job even if you don't take the slightest part in it.
Respect for the person who does it all and never asks for credit. Yes, we all know that's selflessness. But selflessness, according to me, requires a certain amount of courage, I've seen in barely two or three people in my life so far.

When you put on a good show about your concern, and I don't disagree that you don't mean it, you do, but what you just do not understand is that the other person, also concerned, was never trying and never will, to compete. He/she simply, I repeat, simply cares. It leaves me speechless at one point too, when you just refuse to see how it's never going to be about who cares more.

When you know you can't deliver one fourth of what you promise/talk about. Why promise?

When you find the other person that incompetent to do things you think you're best at, why don't you do them yourself to begin with?

What makes you think you're the only person who cares?
Just because you want the world to revolve around you doesn't mean you'd be the only person revolving around the person you apparently love. There are others who love that person too.

One of the things I haven't mentioned about Delhi so far in the almost half year that I spent there (and if isn't an obvious point being stated), is how fascinating the crowd of the city is inside a mall/theatre. It really makes me think at some point, as to how much time is spent by one, everyday, to make trivial decisions of day to day life. And how something that maybe of utmost importance to a resident of one city maybe of no importance to another.
And I don't deny that I'm not a part of it, but sure, I put my own opinion before anyone else who's capable of controlling my state of mind.

My posts here are mostly random. Incidents, situations in life.
Yes, no names mentioned. Of places, humans, whatever else. I like it that blurred in writing. And clear in my head. Crystal.

That awkward moment when you realize that all this while, you've been in love with the idea of being in love with someone and not really the actual person!!

There is obviously no humanity left in our country with all that's happening around..
There is a colossal need for change in the mentality of the people!

And a dog (pug named Romeo) was asleep on my lap while I typed a little bit of the above :)

Winters can kill!

Just One Last Time (ft. Taped Rai) - David Guetta
Oblivion - Bastille
Covering Your Tracks - Amy Stroup
Crank It Up - David Guetta
Speechless - Morning Parade
A Thousand Years - Christina Perri
Kiss me - Ed Sheeran